The First Time I Failed at Writing – Why I Stopped Copying Writing Routines and Started Building a System

I've been a writer and editor for over 8 years now. 

That means I know what it takes to finish a novel, to reach “The End,” to get through draft after draft... However, I was once a struggling writer who thought finishing a manuscript was only for “those” people.

I have made plenty of mistakes along the way, both as a writer and an editor, but now I have a toolbox of methods that work for me no matter what stage I am at in the writing journey and never worry if I am failing at writing. 

Did you know that you can even fail at writing?

We’ll let me tell you, you can (and it's not in the way you think). Wrap yourself in your favorite warm blanket, grab a hot beverage (I prefer tea), and settle in. Now, it’s time for a story about the first time I failed at writing.

Closed Eyes: I HAD to Succeed

Let me set the scene for you, the year is 2018, and I have just become a full-time caregiver who was excited at the prospect that in between the hands-on moments of caring for both my infant niece and ailing grandmother, I would have more time to dedicate to my manuscript. 

This time was significant because I still viewed success by societal standards and felt that my only way to reach “success” was to finish my manuscript in two weeks and then get an agent and traditionally publish the novel (because it is so obviously that simple). I wasn’t ready for how hard writing is when you try to make it into a routine. Before becoming a caregiver, I worked at a donation call center and was a full-time college student. Writing was my only hobby and whenever I wasn’t at work, or in class, or studying, I was writing. It seemed so easy because I only sat down and wrote when I was inspired. Now, when I “had the time” I couldn’t seem to write a word. I was completely uninspired.

Little did I know my writing slump (or writer's block) had nothing to do with time or inspiration.

And because this manuscript was THE answer to becoming successful, I had a lot to prove in trying to finish it quickly.

Spoiler alert: I didn’t finish the manuscript in those two weeks or that month or even that year.

Pssst, do you want to know how to get out of your head and back into your writing in a way that has your writing more in less time? then you may want to download my 7x7 Writing Action Plan, the only action plan you need to write more in one week than you have in the last month.

Click here to download the action plan now

3 Things that Led to My Failure at Writing

When you look at how I failed at finishing the manuscript in those two weeks, you could easily think the reason I failed was due to not having enough time or simply not writing. 

In reality, there were 3 things I was doing that led to me only writing 200 words TOTAL in those two weeks.

#1. I was Copying Other People’s Writing Advice 

Growing up at my house, creative ventures weren’t nurtured so I was constantly waving around the books and stories of professional writers to convince my family that it was possible and lucrative to work with words for a living.

This led to not trusting my own instincts and relying fully on trying to copy the lives and routines of those renowned writers. 

The Solution: 

Instead of putting my energy into researching and mimicking the routines of writers (most of which are able to dedicate ENTIRE DAYS to their novels), I now rely solely on nurturing my writer identity and a writing system that works for me and my current life.

This has led me to not only being able to finish multiple projects in a timeline that makes sense to me, but also being able to ENJOY writing again!  

Remember, if you have been beating yourself up about not finishing that novel, you may be missing the point of writing: TO ENJOY THE PROCESS. I know it might sound cliché or induce heavy eye-rolling, but you aren’t going to finish the novel until you love writing it (and even if you finish it out of hate you won’t ever want to move to the 2nd draft or the publication process).

#2. A Lack of Gratitude

Remember, I was looking at writing as a way to climb the societal success ladder, which meant I wasn’t tapping into how grateful I was to be a writer.

I came to the empty page every day while the baby napped or once my grandmother was settled watching her favorite show and my mindset when I sat down in front of the screen was simply: Write the story that will make you famous. I wanted to be more than a writer, I wanted to be THE Writer. 

That may be what you want too, and that isn't necessarily a bad desire. However; when that is more important than the story and/or the act of writing, the gratitude of being creative starts to fade and societal pressure starts to build.

And that is when writers block rears its head.

The Solution: 

I developed a failsafe way to get myself out of writing slumps and never feel overwhelmed or burnt out in front a blank page again.

The key was to let go of other’s desires for me and other’s writing routines (It was really really hard). Once I was able to push through my ego and pride, nurture my gratitude toward writing, and start building a system that worked for me, everything changed. 

If you want to get started on building your writing system grab my FREE 7x7 Writing Action Plan here!

#3. Forgetting My Identity As A Writer

It's easy to look back at this and think that it seems so obvious what I was doing wrong, but we're saying that with all the hindsight in the world.

At the time, I was sure that all I had to do was reach “The End” for my life to change, and as the days went on I was sure that was something I would never be able to do.

The Solution: 

Reaffirming my identity was the thing that led to finally finding and putting systems in place that allows me to consistently write on the stories of my heart each day.

We know that our identity is multifaceted and maybe we know that we hold certain aspects of our identity closer to our heart than others, but one thing that I hadn’t done was actually nurture an identity. 

As a caregiver, being an aunt and granddaughter were two identities that were at the forefront of my life and in many ways were all consuming. I did tell people I was a writer, but I didn’t really understand what that meant FOR ME. 

Once I started diving deep into what I loved about writing and how I wanted to show up as a writer, I was able to stop fighting with my writing. 

Knowing what is important to you as a writer and how your writing identity weaves into your other identities, you are able to learn necessary information to create a writing system for yourself. 

Perseverance Pays Off

I wish I could say that I never failed in my time as a writer. That would be impossible, though, because failing as a writer only happens when you stop prioritizing your writer identity and start focusing on the outward rewards.

I want to be clear here. You are not failing as a writer if you struggle to write, if you haven’t written in days, weeks, months, even years. Getting stuck at the blank page doesn’t make you a failed writer, it makes you human. A writing failure is someone who doesn’t get back up, who lets the blank page eat away their hopes and dreams. That’s how you fail.

Once I stopped focusing outward and started focusing inward I was able to FINALLY reach “The End” and finish my manuscript. I have now made it my mission to help other writers build their writing system and reach “The End” effortlessly and start writing more words in less time. 

Here at Bibliophage Press we live and breathe writing because it is who we are and what brings joy to our days!

Over on Instagram and TikTok, we’ve been sharing our tips and techniques for writing and editing and all things writing craft to help you reach “The End.”

The 7x7 Writing Action Plan is an action plan I created to help you start to build a writing system that works for you. This action plan is meant to get you writing more in the next 7 days than you have in the last month by creating a realistically productive writing week! Grab the action plan here.

Got a question about building a personalized writing system, or anything related to writing and editing? Get in touch over here and we can chat!